I Had Kinda A Busy Week.

You remember when Cassandra Cat tipped me off about her cousin’s break-in? And how, at the time, I was thinking to myself how I had a funny feeling she had some ulterior motive for mentioning that?

Turns out funny feelings like that are why I’m a detective.

The Secretary with the Crooked Smile.

By the time I got back to the station, Cassie had disappeared. Completely. Nobody had seen her, on either side of the law. Since I wasn’t currently after her for nothing, she wasn’t going to ground, so that meant she was working her devious wiles on a mark somewhere.

She probably wasn’t having to work very hard.

The Inscrutable Outsider.

If Cassie has one weakness, then that’s her peripheral vision. There’s always at least one person she forgets to charm or seduce or befriend or all three until it’s too late. That fact has saved my tail on more than one occasion, though I’ve never been the overlooked party before. To her credit, it’s always the person who looks like the least threat. To her debit, she’s not always right about that. To her credit again, she usually is.

The Wicked Man of Luxury.

We got a call from some company–no idea what they do, cause I don’t care–that somebody had indulged in a little express embezzlement. Normally things like that would just fly right by me while I waited for something more interesting, but ever since Cassie went undercover, so to speak, I’ve had my ears pricked.

The Police Detective.

So help me out. Are you going to be telling me what I had for lunch based on the shape of my footprint, or are you going to be demanding a pound of flesh? Either one seems likely.

“I’m… just here to investigate, ma’am.”

So that’s the first one, then. She writes ‘Some geek, here to poke his nose into stuff’ on the security sign-in pad, next to the time, Too bad, my boyfriend could use someone shaving off a pound or two.

I tink dis broad is da crook! Max whispers loudly.

Same to you, appetizer, she sneers. I move Max along before we can waste any more time.

The Man in the Last Decay of Senility.

All I’m gonna say about the victim is it would have helped if he were either not stupid or not transparently dishonest. Both ain’t a good combination.

The Happy Common Man.

It was lucky for a lot of people that Cassie has that blind spot. Lucky for me, because it meant I had at least one person who wasn’t trying to stymie my inquiries. Lucky for the local poohbah, because I was tis close to hauling him off for the sticky finger job, which is obviously exactly what Cassie had planned. Lucky for himself, because he just kept his company from firing him as being too close to a scandal and knowing too much. Lucky for Max, because the sooner we leave the less chance that crabby secretary is gonna try to eat him.

The Peace of God.

No, I’m not gonna tell you how I got her to confess. It wasn’t like that. It wasn’t like THAT, either. We had a little discussion, that’s all.

That one office girl is a real gold-digger, though. That’s all I’m gonna say about that. Cute, but a real Vamp.

She gave me her numba, Sly.


The Final Word.


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