Harry Ape’s Observation Skills Are Sub-Par.

Why don’t buildings have alleys anymore? There’s nothing like an alley for framing you dramatically, drawing the attention to the dramatic focus of a scene, implying and associating a sense of foreboding. In the old days, when you’d go out to track down a mysterious poster guy, you’d be following him down long, high, narrow alleys, echoing like abandoned cathedrals. I blame cars; now that nobody walks anymore, get closed up, built over, abandoned.

Nowadays it’s all parks and nonsense. No drama at all. Pathetic.

You ever tried to loom ominously behind a tree?

If a Pimp Running a Poker Grift in Public in Broad Daylight With a Cartoon Burglar and a Gay Biker Thug Doesn't Make This a Seedy Underworld, Then I Do Not Know What Will.

If a Pimp Running a Poker Grift in Public in Broad Daylight With a Cartoon Burglar and a Gay Biker Thug Doesn't Make This a Seedy Underworld, Then I Do Not Know What Will.

I traced the posters to a lovestruck graphic design student, beaver, short, looked way too innocent to be involved in any of this, which might not be worth much. She said that there had been a kid handing out stacks of them.

After asking around for what felt like weeks–because surprise surprise ‘A Kid’ is not much of a witness profile–I found a kid who said that he was one of a bunch of people that handed out posters. Had to buy him a three hotdogs to get the info out of em, idiot kept dropping them.

But I did get a lead on the posters.

So predictably I have to stop and handle something completely extraneous. On the plus side, it’s an actual crime, which is a nice change. On the other hand, it takes just five minutes and a phone call to ‘solve’ the mystery, so it’s not exactly a challenge. But hey, at least that means I can get back to work.

It aint fair, man! Wouldn had ta stash dese cash if it weren’t for dose dang posters!

Wait what?

“Wait what?”

Well, basickally when I saw dem po-lice posters goin up I knew I hadz to stash dese cash cuz you coppers wuz watchin me!

“Any chance you could tell me where this was?”

In dah alley up on sevent street!

Well how do you like that. I get an alley.

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